This is honestly one of the stupidest movies I’ve ever had the displeasure of viewing.

The worst offense is how absolutely, insurmountably boring the entire film is. The dialogue between The Barkeep (Ethan Hawke) and The Unmarried Mother (Sarah Snook) felt like it took three hours to complete, and the accompanying flashback montage was equally tedious.

Predestination is at best uninteresting to look at, and at worst downright ugly. The cinematography is static and bland throughout. The color scheme is drab and brown.

The plot is pretentious garbage. The Spierig brothers believe themselves to be so clever, meanwhile any viewer with a functioning brain has surmised the “twist” long before the actual reveal.

The performances were adequate, though Sarah Snook’s narration – and voice in general as The Unmarried Mother – was irritating at best.

I wish I could go back in time and not waste an hour and a half on this rubbish.

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